Like what? What is your relationship like? Some say they’re hard work, others says it’s like having a kid, and still others say it’s a pain in the ass and shouldn’t be so much work, but they wouldn’t trade it for the world…and I agree. I’ve been in a relationship for sixteen years and it’s all of the above but I have a story to tell about a good friend of mine.
I’ve known this young lady for about two years now and we’ve become friends within the last year. She’s married and has two sons. She’s been married for 8 years. But for the past several months, she hasn’t been feeling her husband. I don’t have the details because I don’t want to push her, when she’s ready to tell me what happened, I’ll listen. But this is what I know…her husband has been communicating with another female via text and she found out. She confronted him and he said nothing has happened. This woman flirts with him and apparently he likes the attention. Attention he hasn’t been getting at home. He said he hasn’t stepped out on the marriage. My friend, on the other hand, thinks that simple flirting can lead to more things, so she threatened to leave. She’s been really stressed out, hasn’t been eating and is really contemplating leaving. Her husband said he doesn’t want her to leave and more importantly, he will not lose his sons. I noticed she’s been flirting with other guys, I think in an attempt to make herself feel better but I see nothing but bad news when things are done for revenge.
Anyway, today the conversation came up about fighting to keep your relationship together. The exact words were, “fighting for your man.” I said, it’s not worth throwing away the relationship over a few text messages. There are also times when you have to chase certain women away from your man. There are some females out there that are just disrespectful. The other ladies in the room agreed.
Sometimes when things get challenging in a relationship, don’t make a rash decision. Sit back. Think of the pros and cons. Think about the good memories. The happier days. If there are more bad days than good, maybe it’s time to cut your losses, however, if the good outweighs the bad, then you need to have a discussion with your partner and come to a decision that sets you on the path to saving the relationship.
I’ve been on the verge of leaving a few times…but I had to cool down before I made a rash decision.
I’m never one to tell anyone what to do when it comes to their relationships, however, there are clear cut times when one should leave. If you’re being abused. Get help and get the hell out. Leave. If your partner is living a double life. Leave. If you’ve been cheated on with a close friend or family member. This is just so egregious that there is no forgiving it. Leave. If your partner is abusive to the children. Get the fuck out.
So, yes relationships are hard, but when you find the right person, hold on and don't let external factors and haters ruin what you’ve built. Now, like I said, I don't know all the details of my friend's situation, but I would tell her the same thing. Try to work it out.
(on a side note, don't ever tell your friends all the details of your relationship issues, they are always the ones to remind you of them when you've long forgotten. In other words: misery loves company.)
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